Victim

I should really start writing some blog posts about my holiday before I forget everything, I think to myself as I wander home from work in the sticky heat that now seems almost tolerable to me after my week in Japan.

My thoughts go no further, as I am suddenly, for the first time in what I have deemed one of the safest countries in the world, viciously attacked in broad daylight. I am taken by surprise, rendering me defenceless against my attacker, and yet passers-by do absolutely nothing to help me.

My assailant is a very large bug of some description. His body is longer than my middle finger, and just as wide, and he has flown directly into my hair and become trapped therein. I have no experience in this sort of situation. I have no idea what is the correct way to deal with the problem. And so I do the first thing that comes to mind.

I drop my bag and my bottle of water, and scream my head off.

While this does not prove effective in removing the monster flying thing from my hair, where it is buzzing at a volume that would rival a jumbo jet engine, it does manage to attract the attention of people who had previously been ignoring my plight. They turn in alarm as the strange foreign girl leaps around in the street smacking her own head, her possessions strewn at her feet.

Kwenchanayo? (are you OK?) asks one brave soul as everyone else backs away nervously.

Yaaaaaaaaarrrrghhhhh!!!!! I bawl hysterically in his surprised face. I catch him with a flailing arm and he jumps, startled and perhaps slightly injured. Suddenly, someone else is holding my arms by my sides, and the man I have just slapped is carefully pulling the insect intruder from my hair and setting it free.

There is a sudden embarrassing silence as everyone gazes at me, and I sheepishly stand there as someone picks up my belongings and hands them to me. The silence is now deafening. I can tell that they all think I am an escaped mental patient. Um… thanks. Sorry. Bye. I say in Korean before walking off in as dignified a manner as I can pretend to pull off right now.

I take it all back. These streets are not safe. Not one bit safe.

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10 thoughts on “Victim

  1. The Parents says:

    After the initial shock of my daughter being viciously attacked all alone, far away in a foreign country, I must say that I was quite relieved to hear that is was just a monster bug and very amused!!!! What are you like??? lolxxxx

    • Well, exactly!! And everyone knows that leaping around and screaming hysterically is the best thing to do when faced with an armed attacker.

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